A Storied Home with Christene Barberich

To say Christene’s home is filled with stories feels like it barely scratches the surface. It’s almost as if having a story is a litmus for any object attempting to pass through the front door. The once-co-founder and EIC of Refinery 29 and now New York Times best-selling author and creator of the weekly newsletter, A TINY APT., is a collector of stories. She seeks out storied pieces in the form of found treasures like cast-off Scandinavian dining chairs rescued from the sidewalk or ceramic Dean and Deluca coffee mugs, proudly made in Vermont. “Like, this is where you drew the line? Who doesn’t have room for two mugs?” she remarked incredulously when we first sat down to chat.

So oftentimes, these stories take shape in real time. This one started while walking up four flights of stairs inside of a Cobble Hill apartment building. Each floor, its own unit, and upon ascending each floor, you were greeted with a slice of life of its inhabitants. Soccer cleats with freshly packed mud. Artwork created by proud elementary-aged artists and hung by even prouder parents. A stroller. A shopping cart. A cheeky welcome mat. The stories of their dwellers spilling into the hallway, too vast to be contained in one home.

We settle around the dining room table, framed by an oversized picture window. In the center of the table is a bowl with a few objects, from which Christene grabs the pair of binoculars, replacing them for her signature thick-framed glasses, and tells us that you can actually see the Statue of Liberty, and in fact, there she is. It sparks a memory of the Aventine Keyhole in Rome, and she mentally takes us there for a moment, describing how, when you align this unassuming keyhole, it perfectly frames the dome of St. Peter’s Basilica in Vatican City.

As we file out of Raffi’s room and back into the living room, gathering our belongings and umbrellas, a necessity of this rainy day, I ask about the two pieces of art above the console. They’re an artist she worked with in a past life at Refinery 29 (another story). The frames are lined with handmade birthday cards and Polaroids of everyday, in-between moments. Her expression layered atop the artist’s own expression, nothing too precious, everything full of meaning.

Here's my full interview with Christene:

JP: Your world has always blended design, storytelling, and a deeply personal creative lens—what are you up to and passionate about these days?

CB: Thank you for saying that... I feel like that's been my lens or True North, even if I didn't know how to describe it, since I was little/growing up on the South Shore of Long Island. Mixing visuals and words and seeing what you can create or what emerges...it really makes me feel alive and of use in the world. 

For the last five years, I've pretty much been in building mode across the board, and at the same time also grounding myself in this new chapter. Launching and growing my newsletter A Tiny Apt. has been so much more than a new job, it's really given me a chance to return to writing again in a more honest and personal way (sometimes it feels like going back to school, reading more about writing and the writing I love now at this point in my life). As well as pursuing the kinds of stories I really love and am curious about across personal style, design, and collecting + more so WHY we collect what we do (the three are like the holy trinity for me:). I named my newsletter A Tiny Apt. because our tiny apartment in Brooklyn is really my muse...maybe even sort of a soulmate. It's 750 square-feet, and during the pandemic when my daughter was turning two, I came to see our home in this whole new way. Corners and bits of it I felt like I was seeing for the first time, moving things around, making it more efficient and inspiring...and more of who me and my family were becoming. And it reminded me a lot of how transformative my life was 20 years ago living in the tiniest studio of all on the Upper West Side...when I think this life was really just beginning, before I met my partner, before I started my former company, etc. So this idea of a small space being a starting point for bigger, more expansive things to grow really resonated...and that's where I wanted to begin writing from. Because I think most of us, particularly after the pandemic or any major shift or break, are starting from. Seeing a beginning as this space that's full of potential and flexibility and versatility and wonder...

I think, too, (and I'm sure a lot of people can relate to this) when I was going to an office everyday, my home was on auto-pilot, a place where I kept my stuff and slept but rarely a place I was deeply connecting with or using as a reflection point to better understand what was happening in my life. A Tiny Apt. became a catalyst for that, getting back into the stuff I really love, particularly how we flex and come alive through change and, as a result, create intimacy and meaning with your design approach, finding better solutions for basic stuff like storage that can really shift how you live. Plus my usual shenanigans around thrifting (which has really pivoted into a kind of therapy/creative refuge for me), finding clothes and outfit ideas that give me tremendous pleasure and joy, etc. Also, in 2020, my family and I bought a place in Columbia County in a town we've been visiting for 15 years. There's a lot to share about it (I have a column about it in my newsletter), but this fall we'll finally start consistently living in the 650 square-foot straw panel/passive cabin we've spent the past four years building...and it's very much a love letter to our daughter. I can't wait to share all the pictures soon, too!

JP: What did you learn about yourself as a leader—especially as a creative one—when building something that had never existed before?

CB: That question really nails it for me...something that's never existed before. A fellow founder once said something to me around 2010 that we were creating roles and meaning that had never existed before, and that really hit me. In any of entrepreneurial endeavors I've been involved in, I've learned different things at different times/different stages of growth, like when collaboration and teamwork is essential and also when inserting my own voice/POV has been necessary, too. I've learned that we don't need to emulate other leaders to be successful (often we discover this through trial and error). We can learn from other successful executives/leaders while also listening to our own instincts and unique strengths, as well as the environment in which we're working, and find an active approach that works for you and your team and your goals. It doesn't have to look like anyone else's...but listening to what feels right for YOU is critical, even if other people don't agree or don't like it. I've also learned that making mistakes as a leader is inevitable and also important. We can't grow and get better if we can't fail and find the courage to get up again...and be encouraged to get up again! I've made mistakes, and acknowledging them/learning from them, being conscientious about not making that same mistake twice matters a lot. Unfortunately, we operate in a world where men are offered so much more grace + space than women. Women leaders are routinely questioned, diminished, and criticized so much more than their male counterparts. I've also noticed how often men are not only permitted to learn on the job, it's encouraged. And, yet women leaders need to be exponentially, often over-qualified, to be taken seriously and given trust. I hope that continues to change. But I think the biggest thing I've learned is defining what success means to you...and for creative people that may look very different than it does for someone in a different role or field. But having that conversation with yourself and staying focused on whether or not a situation is serving you or is perhaps taking you away from what really matters. And of course, new industries and ideas aren't the result of success after success...they are the result of success after lots of big hairy fails and left turns and happy accidents. The work and the learning become the beating heart of innovation and creativity and seeing the tiny clues of what's coming into focus as a result. And which parts of that YOU truly love and feel inspired by so you can follow THOSE breadcrumbs...

JP: Who are the voices or creators that inspire you most today— and what are they doing differently?

CB: I love Hannah Einbinder and Jean Smart of the show "Hacks" and the complexities of their relationship, both professional and personal. So much of it is real, particularly in creative environments, and also this dire need for women to have each other's backs when we take big swings even if it's competitive...because we need each other to take those big swings in the first place. I loved the connection between Jenny Slate and Michelle Williams' characters in "Dying for Sex", too...your soulmate can be your best friend, and truly what a gift that is? I love love love the magazine and video series Never Too Small, which also offers a vibrant lens on small spaces and particularly creative solutions to small space challenges. It's addictive. Also, I talked about how much Brian Eno and his approach to music and sound has meant to me in this newsletter, and really it's a reminder to pay attention to what YOU like and not what your algorithm wants you to. On the newsletter front, I love Hot Tip, Back Row, HOME, What's Left?, Cabana, Alison Roman's A Newsletter, Deeply Madly, Time Travel Kitchen, Herb Sundays, Schmatta, and Living Small...I'm sure I'm forgetting some...there's a lot to appreciate on the Substack front:). 

JP: When you think about the role of clothing in your life, not as a business but as a woman—what stories do your own favorite pieces tell?

CB: This is where my nostalgia and sentimentality can REALLY get the better of me. I try to only keep the pieces from my life and experiences that I still want to wear. I love vintage and collect pieces from so many incredible designers, like Ossie Clark, Jean Muir, YSL, the list goes on. What occurs to me though is it's almost criminal to have these beautiful pieces of history just sitting in my storage closet...when someone else can be wearing them or using them as inspiration. So, that's what I've been trying to do...go through everything really thoughtfully with an eye for deciding, will I keep this for my daughter? Is there someone in my life who would really love this (a Norma Kamali 1980s pantsuit!)? Recently, I sold a dress I wore on the cover of a magazine. It was a really emotional time...the whole image was beautiful and this whole new part of my life was unfolding. And yet, when I would see that dress in my closet, I just didn't want to wear it again. When I heard about the person who bought it, it made me so happy....knowing they were excited and wanted to put it into action immediately. Clothes are meant to be worn and loved and experimented with so we can tease out these precious parts of us that have been covered or hidden away or beaten down...clothes and particularly the RIGHT clothes can be a salve for connecting with ourselves...again and again.

JP: Is there something you wear—not for how it looks, but for how it makes you feel? What’s the story there?

CB: Oh yes, so many things, but in particular this oversized black men's cashmere vtg YSL coat. It's divine and I just feel like I can do anything when I wear it....it makes me feel like ME in the best possible way. A black silk Rachel Comey blazer with these vintage flared pants I found at a thrift store in Paris...I live in fear of them falling apart. And also, a pair of now vintage 90s Prada mary-janes that I found at the local TJMaxx for $50...I think I was so broke when I found them, I put them on lay-a-way and paid for them over a few months. I treasure them and when I wear them now, people always ask me about them. Prada is forever. 

JP: Where do you go when you need to reconnect with your creativity or your sense of self?

CB: The Morgan Library, Cooper Hewitt Design Museum, a park or nature, Vintage Thrift Store in Manhattan (which is like my Church), the Goodwill (any Goodwill), the NYPLibrary's great room to work for the afternoon...getting on a plane or going to Paris is ALWAYS good for the creative soul, too. And to the movies or just sitting in my moody bedroom to watch something old and BRILLIANT like Enchanted April....heaven!

JP: What everyday rituals bring you joy?

CB:Taking my early morning walk or dancing at Bodycraft in my neighborhood (it's MAGIC), making good coffee every morning, making the bed, writing in my journal + being grateful for every beautiful and tiny thing that's helped me to grow and feel more alive in the world (even when it hurts). Giving my husband and daughter hugs, calling my mom or sister, smiling at strangers (not in a creepy way!)...

JP: Is there a phrase or idea guiding you lately—something that feels like a mantra or anchor in this season of life?

CB: Yes, recently I heard this leadership coach named Steff (Coach with Steff on IG) say "Words have wings," meaning, choose your words and thoughts wisely. It's really caused me to think....do I really want to do this? Do I really like this? How does this make me feel? What do I want to say about this? It's simple and I can already feel it having an effect on how I move through my day. My other mantra is pretty simple. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. When in doubt: Thank you.